I ain’t got none.
I’m tired. Uninspired.
Put up a poster and hope it provides some oomphff. Yeah, right! Not here. Fuckit.
It’s the routine of caffeine and nicotine that make the monotony of each day bearable as we look forward to the monthly paycheck and the great gig in the sky after the final dinner with the worms.
Booze, porn and video games help, too, while for the happy-clappy and bright-eyed airheads amongst us someone’s gone and made a million-dollar business out of “Motivational Posters” because…
“in our world of instant gratification, people desperately want to believe that there are simple solutions to complex problems. And when desperation has disposable income, market opportunities abound.”
And greed. Greed’s a great motivator. Greed is good. Greed makes hungry. Jealousy also works well, as does a dose of plagiarism — like those nice ‘n cynical entrepreneurs at despair.com have done. Your misery = my profit. Add pinch of salt to taste.
Needless to say, these delightfully disparaging “demotivational posters” have since mutated into their very own viral artform, variations of which have already wormed their way into all corners of the interwebs as one of the current memes, all the more curious when mated with LOLcats. And since we’ve been discussing internet culture and, for reasons beyond us, this blog is infested with felines, how about this four-eared specimen? It’s just a matter of time before Yoda is also given the LOLcats treatment.
Mind you, it’s not all doom and gloom: Today’s sift through the spam folder included the following gem, purportedly sent by “Top News Agency” with the headline “Aliens Are Gay Says Astronaut”.
The rest of the article goes on to say that…
Former Astronaut Dr. Edgar Mitchell – a veteran of the Apollo 14 mission – claims aliens are gay and that they are responsible for many of the earth’s ills including global warming, war, disease and The View.
…while from “kakoli Worcester” came the sensational message that “Paris Hilton’s vagina bites mailman!”
Perhaps not quite motivational but awe-inspiring shit nonetheless!
Image credits: Unknown